Getting through the day

Thursday, May 10, 2012

The past few weeks the emails, commercials and marketing tools for Mother's Day have been on and on. 

Four years later and it isn't any easier to hear or see, "Shower your mom with love." Or "Make sure to let your mom know how much she means to you this Mother's day."  Delete, mute, turn the corner.

I wouldn't say I'm bitter but I also wouldn't say I'm not. In a way I am bitter. Bitter that showering my mom with love means leaving flowers on her grave. Bitter that I can't call my mom on the phone or send her the flowers to show her how much she means to me. I just have to whisper it into the wind. 

But I'm also not bitter of the fact that I still have amazing other women in my life. Look at these women I get to send mother's day cards to. Women who are there for me and support me. 

And let's not forget I get to be a cat mommy to this cutie. Yes, I said that. 

Past years I have used the distraction to get me through the day. And it's worked. Even with all the commercials. The first year I spent it at school feverishly packing up all my belongings for the end of my college career and spending it with my man and best friend. 

Last year, I spent the day at work and it was a pleasant distraction. Dodging the question about what I was doing later with my mom wasn't the best but I made it through.

This year, it is all about positive energy. Doesn't matter what people think I should do or act on Mother's Day. It's about celebrating my mom and doing things in her honor or for her. Doing things that make me happy. 

Even though this week will continue to be hard for me, it's about dealing with it the best way I know how. The best way I can. And this year it will include finally! signing for a wedding venue! Something positive to deal with the sadness. 

Until then...just trying to get through.

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