Friendship for a Reason, Season or Lifetime?

Thursday, October 29, 2015

Friendship is something that I have been truly blessed with in my life. But I can't help but think lately how friendships have changed over the years. How some friendships held on while others did not it. Then, I came across this quote and just how fitting it was.

I really like thinking about this in regards to own life, my own friendships. The reason friendships. They address a  need you have at that current moment and that person is meant to fulfill it, help you with it. It was the college friend that introduced me to my sorority but wasn't a friend when I graduated. It's the co-worker turned friend that pushed me to excel to move up in the company.

Friendships for the seasons last a little longer, teach you a little bit more. These could be the high school friendships who build your confidence, your college friends. For me, it was the 30 plus sisters I lived with who taught me patience, compassion and that doors should always shut quietly but did not make it past the handing out of the diplomas.

It's when you leave for college and you are separated from the people you have probably spent the good part of 10 years or more with. There are some friendships that survive this change. I am very lucky that I have quite a few that withstood this test. But there were others that I realized were meant for the season of small town living. To help me grow into myself while I was in high school but couldn't sustain any longer in college.

It's entering the seasons of marriage and becoming moms. Are there certain friends that aren't supposed to be in your new season as a wife? Maybe there are friendships that have gone through their season of college and post-college but aren't supposed to help you grow into the wife you are meant to be.

Then come the babies. Oh, the adorable babies. They come in with their cuteness and charm. It's a totally different season. It's overwhelming for the newest mom. It's more of where can I take my baby that she won't scream or I need to find out who can watch my baby. It's expecting less phone calls but still being understanding. Again, there are friendships that won't understand the 24 hour later text back or who are going through their own season and need someone more involved. It's the friendships that won't lift you up as a mom, that just can't survive that season.

Through all of these seasons, the most important thing is to be there for each other, maybe one person more than the other at certain times. I still remember my friend had a one year old and took a girls beach trip with us. Another friend still goes out to drink margaritas with me at bachelorette parties. This might not be an every weekend thing like we used to do bu these small moments are all the friendship needs. The texts every once in awhile to check in, say hello.

You will see friendships change, friendships just stop being friendships.It might be the single friend was meant to be with you on nights out but not by your side as you are a wife. Or maybe the it's the high school friend who was there through everything , break-ups, make-ups, marriage, just was meant to help you through all of that but no longer can help you grow.

I know there will be more seasons, more friendships. I am excited to enter into the mom's club one day. Even though it can be hard to look back and see my friendships that were only meant to survive for a short time, I then look at who's here now.

My lifetime friends. Or so I hope they are. The friends who teach me lessons, who see the worst in me but love me anyway and the ones that give me support to be who I am supposed to be. These are the ones that have helped me in the tough moments, will continue to encourage me through the anxious moments (motherhood, yikes!) and will always teach me in my different seasons.

I can't look into the future. I can't predict who will continue to be a lifetime friend or who will only turn out to be a friend for a season. I'm sure there will be new friendships for reason and maybe even a new lifetime friend to join the mix. But I do know, I am very fortunate for my friendships. Whether they are for a reason, a season or lifetime.

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,you will know what to do for each person.
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.

They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the person, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.
It is said that love is bling but friendship is clairvoyant.
-Author Unknown


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