When an Introvert Marries an Extrovert

Thursday, June 5, 2014

By nature, I was born an introvert. I had my years where I fought against it but it was always there. I craved taking a break, taking a night to myself. The typical introvert. 
An introvert is a person who is energized by being alone and whose energy is drained by being around other people.

In college, I always wanted to know when my roommate wasn't going to be in the room and took that time to really enjoy the room. Even if there was a huge party going on. I need to recharge by myself.

My husband is the definition of an extrovert. He loves people. Being around people. Talking to people. Making small talk. All the things that make me cringe.

 An extrovert is a person who is energized by being around other people. This is the opposite of an introvert who is energized by being alone.

It might sound like these two types of people could never exist, but in fact, it has been shown that these two types of people make the perfect couple. As if we needed to be told that.

Basic rundown of what happens when an introvert marries an extrovert:

|| Wants to go out when you just want to sit on the couch and watch a movie

|| After work, writing calms you and they just want to talk about the day.But living out the whole day has already drained you.

|| People and crowds are their thing. For you, crowds and people make you want to sit in the corner.

|| Center of attention is the ultimate goal. But for you, when all eyes are on you, all kinds of uncomfortable happens. Wedding day, anyone?

But, fear not introverts. Marrying an extrovert has its rewards.

-Like he will be the one organizing your social calendar so you actually have fun activities on your weekends off. Otherwise, you might just sit at home watching Grey's Anatomy on Netflix. Embrace the nights out, to allow him to air the extrovertness. And give you the experiences you actually do want before kids.

-He teaches you just how to deal with the attention a little more. Let's not go overboard and say you love it, but you learn to appreciate the fact that people enjoy your company and want to get to know you. You will get used to them wanting to flaunt you around and brag about your life. Allow them to boast a little. He will go deep, while you stay surface. You will learn from him.

-He gives you that confidence you might lack when going after what you really want. Teachings in how to be awesome. When they go up to people, listen to him, feed off of what he is saying.

And for your extroverts. An introvert can really slow you down and let your grow, in the best way possible.

-Like realizing how nice it is to take time to recollect yourself after an exhausting day. Rather than jump right into a days recap. Let the introvert have some moments to themselves. Acknowledge that they need that.

-Teaching you just how great it is to have hobbies and be by yourself. All hobbies. They really are stress relievers that you can have by yourself and can be fun. Start a hobby with your introvert. Make it a couples date. Make it fun and another way to allow your introvert to recharge away from a group.

-Allowing you to realize that you are your best self. With or without the approval of others. And other people cheering you on. You are your biggest cheerleader.  Let an introvert teach you how to be your own cheerleader, but help them reach out to others for help.

With any relationship, it's always an adjustment. Learning the way to your introvert/extroverts heart is another one of the adjustments. But the rewards allow for a much greater growth in your marriage.

What have you encountered in an introvert/extrovert relationship?

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  1. I love this post! I am the introvert and my husband the extrovert and all of these things have happened. Its especially true about the counter-balancing positives you mentioned, I have seen them in action. Hope it keeps going just as well!

    Lovin' Lee Life

  2. Adjustments are hard to make but if you really love the person and really want to make it work. Then you will do whatever it takes. I"m glad me and my hun are so much alike we just click.


  3. Yes yes and yes again. We are the same way. It's difficult, and like anything in marriage, requires compromise. But, I've done a lot of things I never would have simply because being married to an extrovert forces you out of your comfort zone!

  4. My husband and I are the same way! He is more the extrovert and I'm the Introvert. I think we both have come a long way, and there are times when I find myself being more of an extrovert and him the introvert. I guess it's true that opposites attract!

  5. This is fantastic. My husband and I are the same way!


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