Yup, talking about a new year in February.
The New Year brings hope and excitement to many. Counting down into the new year where you hope to be a better person, have a better job, look better, etc. It's full of hope. It's full of positivity.
That was me New Year's Eve 2008. I saw 2009 as one of my best years yet. I was going to graduate. Get a new job in the corporate world. I had hopes of a bright future, a great future.
12 days later my world came crashing down. I lost my mom in the blink of an eye. That hope was gone. It was replaced with darkness, sadness. I did graduate but went back home to an empty home.
When the clock counted down to enter 2010, I was terrified. Terrified what the new year would bring again. I couldn't have hope when less than a year before I had so much hope that was taken away.
Something I feared every New Year is something that many people struggle with every day. Having hope. Having faith in the unknown.
I focus a lot on what could go wrong instead of having hope it will go right.
I fear the unknown instead of embracing it. It's what fuels my anxiety. And it has to go.
I have to embrace that whatever happens is exactly what is supposed to happen. That God is in control.
There is a lot to be hopeful for, have hope and faith in. Even if we are on a shaky start this year doesn't mean great things aren't on their way for the 11 other months. I have to let my worries go. I am not in control. And that's ok.
Here's to embracing the unknown. Here's to me trying to actually do that!

Here's to embracing the unknown. Here's to me trying to actually do that!

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